Cartman goes on a diet
by Tochi Kitsune Moga
Summary: This is a story my 10 yr old bro wanted to write. He had to write it under my name because he couldn't get his own account. The title explains it all. R&R Rated for mild languege.
1. Going to Chef

CHAPTER 1

The day started like any other day in South Park. Everybody was in school pretending to pay attention to Mr. Garrison while waiting for the bell to ring and let them out of prison. "Ok class does anybody have any questions? Yes fat ss," Mr. Garrison asked Cartman.

"Hey don't call me that," yelled Cartman.

"Oh sorry fat ss," said Mr. Garrison while not sounding apologetic at all.

"Hey," shouted Cartman.

"Ok class dismissed," Mr. Garrison said ignoring Cartman.

Cartman, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny left there class and started walking home. "You know what I noticed Cartman," said Stan.

"What," Cartman asked.

"You're a fat ss," Stan smirked.

"Hey," Cartman yelled.

Cartman had arrived at his home and started watching TV like any other day. "Hey mom," Cartman asked his mom.

"What is it my little piggy," asked Mrs. Cartman.

"Hey! Why does everyone keep calling me fat?" Cartman was interrupted by a knock on the door. His mom answered it letting in Kyle, Stan, and Kenny.

"Hey Cartman," they all said.

"Hey guys, I have a question," Cartman said.

"What is it," they all asked.

"Why does everyone always call me fat?"

"Maybe that's because you are," said Kyle. Stan and Kenny started snickering.

"Hey! Just get out! I'm sick and tired of you guys calling me fat!" They all did as they were told and left, but were still laughing. "I'm sick and tired of everybody calling me fat," Cartman said to himself. "I need to go talk to Chef and see what I should do."

When Cartman got to Chef's house he asked what he should do about people always calling him fat. "Well maybe you should go on a diet," suggested Chef.

"A diet," asked Cartman, "What the hell is that going to do, make me suffer?"

"Well," said Chef, "it will probably help you lose weight."

"Ok fine I'll do it, but this is gonna suck ss." He went home after leaving Chef's house. "Hey mom can I go on a diet to lose weight," asked Cartman.

"Ok dear," said Mrs. Cartman, but you won't be able to eat any fattening food."

"Can I eat Cheesy Poofs?"

"I'm sorry honey, but if you go on a diet you can't eat any Cheesy Poofs."

"Man, diets suck ss."

"Watch your language honey."

"Sorry mom. Oh well I'll have to do it anyway," Cartman said to himself.

END OF CHAPTER 1


	2. head trauma

The next day, Cartman and his friends were at his house watching Terrance and Phillip when a commercial came on. _'Hey kids, would you like some cheesy puffs?'_

Everyone yelled, "Yeah!"

Cartman's mom had, hearing her son's shout, told him, ""Sorry Eric but your on a diet and you can't have any."

Kyle looked confused, "Why is Cartman on a diet?"

Cartman turned to Kyle angrily, "because you guys keep calling me fat!"

"Well we can't help it every time we look at you the only thing we can think about is how fat you are!

"Hey shut up, at least I'm not a freaking Jew."

"You know what I'm going home," Kyle said while getting off the couch.

"Fine! Go home! See if I care!"

"Fine, I'm going! Come on Kenny," Kyle yelled. The two friends started walking down the street while Eric and Stan watched them go. A car suddenly came out of nowhere and hit came sending him flying down the street.

Stan yelled, "OMG! They killed Kenny!"

"You bstrds!" yelled Kyle.

"Oh well, who cares. He will just come back to life some time later," Cartman said completely unfazed.

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The next day at school Mr. Garrison was taking attendance. "Hey, has anyone seen Kenny?" he asked.

"Oh he's dead," answered Stan.

"Well that's a relief I thought he was absent or something," said Mr. Garrison. After class, Eric went to Mr. Garrison's desk.

"Mr. Garrison what can you do lose weight on a diet," Cartman asked.

"Well you eat good food and do active things like sports," said Mr. Garrison.

"Ok that's all I wanted to know."

Right after school Cartman went to Chef's house. "Chef what is a fun sport I can play to help me lose weight," asked Cartman?

"Well basketball is fun, try that," said Chef.

"Ok," said Cartman. He went home and started playing basketball, till Kyle and Stan showed up.

"Hey Cartman," they all said.

"Hey guys, what's up? Do you want to play basketball with me?"

"Sure," they said.

"Heads up Cartman," said Kyle. He threw the ball to Cartman who missed. The ball hit him in the head, and he fell backwards and hit his head on the basketball pole. "Cartman?" they started poking him.

"I think we had better get him to a hospitable," Stan told Kyle.

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At the Hells Pass Hospitable, Kyle and Stan were in the waiting room bored out of there minds. A docter finally came into the room and the two looked up. The docter cleared his throat before saying, "your friend seems to be suffering from head trauma. He can't remember who he is and thinks he is a black man in a gang."

Well that's the end of chapter two! R&R!


End file.
